Why Is It So Hard To Be Supportive?

The journey to success is not easy. If you’re doing something that people don’t quite understand, or something that goes against the grain of normalcy, you can find yourself lonely. Some of the most successful people in the world will tell you that they have become accustomed to the solitude that comes with a hectic schedule, or an insatiable work ethic. Perfect example? Oprah. She shared these sentiments in her interview with Barbara Walters. People don’t care if you’re sick, sad, or whatever…they’re expecting you to be everything that they’ve imagined or more, all day everyday. Another example: Beyonce. In the following clip from the I AM…World Tour DVD, she goes shopping…only to be berated by a throng of picture seekers, and one particular fan who interprets her actions in the wrong way. Check it out.:

Being at the top of your game has it’s perks, but it’s definitely not as glamorous as it seems. While everyone may not be able to relate to your situation, one should never take for granted the importance of having a support system that does what they can to encourage you as you go. Unfortunately these days, finding people that will really have your best interests at heart is like finding a needle in a haystack. In today’s culture, we are so self-motivated, that it’s difficult to see how supporting each other collectively translates to individual advancement.

We will tear the next person down, thinking that in some way, that will take them out of the game and make more room for us to get some shine. You see it in the comment section of gossip blogs…and it’s most predominate among women. Cattiness is rampant, ugly, and by far, one of the most unattractive qualities to have. We all have that one “friend” who’s the “discourager”… you know the one who asks you why you’re doing what you’re doing, or tells you that you probably don’t have the qualifications to apply for the job you really want…yeah.

That friend should be immediately exiled. But those friends that will support you should be cherished. There is something to be said about someone who will be in the trenches with you. That person is truly standing by you only seeking the satisfaction of knowing that you will achieve your goals. On the same token, you also have to be willing to support your friends. It’s give and take. You can not base your success on the success someone else has…so comparing yourself to someone else is futile. Therefore, it costs nothing to offer an encouraging word, a resource, a smile, a share on Facebook or a retweet on Twitter. Really successful people, form networks, and pull each other up as they move along. Oprah did it for Dr. Phil, Dr. Oz, Nate Berkus, and Rachel Ray…so you can do just the same in your own circle.

What we’re missing today is the “I eat, you eat” / “I win, you win” philosophy. Instead we’ve become so used to the crabs in a barrel mentality that it’s now the standard. Today’s challenge is to build someone up! We, as humans, need the support of others. I don’t really think that there is someone who is truly independent. We all need someone else to provide something that we can not or don’t know how to provide ourselves. It’s these unique qualities that come together to weave the perfect blanket of support, something that keeps you warm at night, knowing that you have someone to call when you need it. Exile the hater, and become a lover. What you are is what you’ll attract…so let your light shine.


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